Appendectomy and Other Fun

Ok I had every intention of writing again way sooner than this, but the last month has been insane. Bear went into the hospital the week before his birthday to have his appendix out. He was sick and in the hospital for a little less than a week. Then he had to make sure he didn't pull his stitches or re-injure himself for 6 weeks after they released him. He was in a ton of pain for weeks. It was killing me to see him so miserable, especially since there was absolutely nothing I could do to help. Thank the Gods that he is recovered and doing fine now.

Then after that drama there was the insanity of the holiday season. *shudder* Enough said about that.

Finally the spring semester just started and because I'm me I have 5 classes right now. Homework is a giant, constantly crushing weight. Bear is taking 3 of the same classes which is mostly helpful. Although since I still have yet to find a job and he works 5 days a week, I end up being responsible for both of our schedules. This does not bother me.

Lately things have felt strange between us. He is still the sweet, wonderful submissive that I love most of the time, but sometimes it feels like he is fighting me even when I am doing what he wants. I don't know if it is just a defiant streak in his nature, or if there is a problem he doesn't want to talk about. I have prompted him to speak to me if something is bothering him several times, but he insists there is nothing wrong. Maybe it is me. Maybe I'm just being too sensitive and jumping at nothing.

It could always just be good old fashioned stress putting both of us on edge. We are both under pressure to save money and do well in school and maybe this is just a side effect. Whatever the case, I want my sweet boy to be my sweet girl again. It seems like forever since I made him feel like his sissy self that he hides from the rest of the world. I think I may have a long overdue surprise for him tonight, depending on how he seems after work. :)

Bad Luck

I know I haven't been writing alot lately, but that is mostly due to a month long string of horrible luck. I lost my job, my car died, I got behind in classes because of the job that I lost, I was very sick for over a month, and other smaller crappy things. So long story short things have been pretty terrible here since the end of October. The only bright spot in this whole ordeal has been my Bear. He has been a true blessing and I honestly don't think I would have survived the last few months without him. If I ever do break down and let you read my blog sweetheart, know that you are wonderful and I am grateful the universe saw fit to bring you into my life.

That being said, I need to finish up with schoolwork so I will have to catch everyone up on my first play party with Bear next time I have some "me time".

Exhausted

Between preparing everything for the divorce, school, and packing I am thoroughly exhausted. I have a ton of things to do and not much time to do them. I am also essentially broke until I get my student loan refund which should be next week. I just hope I can get everything to come together. Preferably before I collapse. I am so thankful I have Bear to help me with everything. Even though we are not technically dating or doing anything naughty, we are still close. I can't wait until I am moved out and settled on my own as a single woman. I only hope everything goes well. Wish me luck.

Nothing Much...As Per Usual

I was going to say I haven't been blogging because I've been busy, but in the interest of truth thats not why. Honestly all of the things keeping me busy are fairly mundane. Sir and I moved...again. So that has been the major part of my busy-ness. Also I am starting college on Monday and the only thing they haven't asked for is a signature in blood. Other than that I've just been trying not to be too bored and grabbing every chance at social activity with both hands and clinging like a survivor of a shipwreck clings to a floating piece of debris. Sometimes I wonder how pathetic I seem to my friends and acquaintances. The lack of social communication with anyone other than Sir and my new kitten, Pumpkin. Maybe it will be good for me in the long run, but for now it is making me crazy! I absolutely cannot wait for Monday...if only I didn't have to be awake before 8 am...

Everything Is Wonderful

I really don't have anything new to report, but I know that if I get in the habit of not posting every couple of days I will forget to post at all. Sir and I are still doing great. Its tough now that He is back in school again, but it is His last semester. He should be graduating in May. I'm so proud of Him. He has been working so hard. I'm also excited because it means I will be able to go back to school in the Fall. He is going to try to get into grad school at the college I am going to so that we can be together. I can't wait to get back into the swing of things again.

What else? Well I have my submissives meeting this Sunday. It should be fun, although I have been getting more and more nervous about driving lately. Its only a 30 min drive and traffic isn't usually too bad so I'm trying not to worry too much. I think Sir and I might also go to the Paradox group meeting this Saturday if He isn't too busy. I haven't been to that one before, but it should be fun.

Well, I guess thats it really. Nothing really new to report.